For one week in June my blog will be known as the 'Radiation Chronicles' to reflect the treatment I would be receiving. Treatment prescribed for the likely metastasis in my left shin. Because of the chronic pain, I couldn't sleep, I couldn't walk, and I couldn't concentrate. My personal and work life were suffering. Pain was now defining my life. Radiation offered hope to relieve that pain.
I had my initial consult with my Radiation Oncologist on Thursday June 11th. The day after I would undergo a CT simulation which would identify the extent of the radiation treatment. After finishing the approximately one hour mapping process, I was handed a green appointment card. My first treatment would start on Monday.
Sunday night and I'm not sleeping. My left leg is throbbing, the only position that brings any sort of relief is when I'm lying prone on my stomach, left leg stretched straight. I don't care that it's in my bones, I just want to sleep.
I arrive at the Cancer Centre well before my appointment time, going directly to the Radiation Registration desk just as they told me to last Friday. I present my green appointment card. The receptionist smiles and comments that I'm a "treatment newby". As I've never received radiation treatment before, the receptionist guides me to the waiting area for Radiation Therapy. I've never been in this part of the Cancer Centre. It seems empty, quieter than where I received chemo. Another patient arrives. He is older, and we exchange muted greetings. I wasn't up to conversation, but my companion was undeterred. However his one-sided conversation was marked by the anger he had towards his disease and how it changed his life. I could only wonder if I would feel similarly in the future.
My co-patient was soon called in for his treatment. Minutes later, a smiling young tech calls my name and leads me to the treatment room. A second tech joins us, and as this was my first treatment they took great care in making me feel comfortable. Patiently they explained that the procedure would be painless and wouldn't take long. My only job would be to simply lie still during the course of treatment. I could do that I thought. First first step was removing my shoes and the sock on my left foot. I had the forethought to wear shorts, so I didn't have remove my pants. No one needs to see that. Next I had to lie down on the table, and my feet were placed into plastic rests that slightly raised my heels off of the table. I was given a pillow for my head, and somewhat tentatively I asked for a second. I like my head propped up a bit, and the techs obliged my simple request. I was surprised by their next request: would I be more comfortable if they strapped me onto the table? It turns out that part of the process involves the table lifting to a height of approximately five feet!
The finicky part of the process was the alignment of my leg. The dots tattooed on my leg last Friday were used for this part. Satisfied that the stars, or at least my leg, was in alignment, the techs left the room to begin the process. Now the table I'm on is raised. I watch as the Varian radiation therapy machine slowly rotates around my leg. This machine is a large and imposing device, moving with a precision I find reassuring. I understand now why the table is raised: so the machine can deliver it's treatment from any angle. During my treatment there will be X-rays to ensure that the alignment is correct before the radiation is actually delivered. My only feeling during this time is the ache in my knees as I try to keep perfectly still. Perhaps because this is my first experience, the time seemed to pass slowly. Random thoughts: what if I have to sneeze, would they stop the procedure? I would later find out that if I was to sneeze then do so, just don't move, especially your arms. Fortunately during my treatment I never had to put that action to the test.
I realized the treatment was completed when the technicians return. My table was slowly lowered, and I have to be patient not to try to sit up too quickly. I had come through my first treatment without incident. With four more treatments remaining, I wondered how long it would be before I felt any improvement.
The rest of the day, perhaps feeling a confidence that I didn't really have, I walked, or rather, limped, a lot. The efforts I put forth attempting to walk "normally" would prove too much. That night exhaustion caught up with me, despite the pain in my shin. Tomorrow I would receive my second treatment, and interestingly, meet with the Radiation Oncologist for a follow up.
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